Strange Bedfellows
by Empatheia
Summary: [Sesshoumaru x dominatrix!OC] Because what pleases her pleases him. Besides, it's fun.


**A/N: **Okay! This story... is _insane. _Really really. And extremely twisted. If any of you like Sess or have problems with dominatrices, bondage, and exhibitionism... **_go elsewhere NOW. _**This is a total zany let's-torture-Sess fic. With crazy sick corruption and weirdness. Heh. By the way, it was a RIOT to write. Also, to avoid confusion... this is supposed to be humorous. Do not take seriously. Thank you.

Kitsune Kit-- don't hate me for this. I'll write you a more innocent, WAFFy type thing if you want. But I have to post this anyways because it's so funny. Forgive me!

OooooooooooooooooooooooooooO

**Thank You #4**: Kitsune Kit

**Show**: Inuyasha

**Pairing: **Sess/OC

**Lemon**: Yes

**Scenario**: She wanted Sess paired with a hanyou by Izayoi and another demon not Inutaisho. Check. She wanted it zany. Check. She wanted Sess-torture. Check. Mwahahaha.

**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**

_**Strange Bedfellows**_

**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**

He met her shortly after Inuyasha' death and loved her on sight. Politics were easy enough to arrange in his favour, to make a match with her make sense. She was mated to him a scant year after the first time they tore each other to contented bleeding shreds in the woods.

Youkai were like that... they fell fast and hard, and usually only once. Sesshoumaru was not an exception to this rule, despite being the exception to a great many others. And Kirei was Kirei, nothing more and nothing less.

Everyone admitted they were perfect for each other, even the ones who hated them. _Especially_ the ones who hated them.

_**I like your pants around your feet**_

Her hakama were pooled on the ground around her slim ankles as she posed for him. He loved it when she did that. "Turn around," he said quietly, and she did.

"How's this, Sesshoumaru my love?"

"Stay there a moment, Kirei."

She was magnificent in her nakedness, her hair (the exact shade of morning glories) holding a violent riot on her head as usual. The bouncy pale blue curls raged at the air, at the sun, at everything. She had _angry _hair, but her eyes of silver-grey were always brilliant and cheerful. It didn't hurt that she was soft and round in all the right places and smooth in all the others.

_  
**And I like the dirt that's on your knees**_

He watched her impassively as she sank to her knees before him. For some reason, she actually seemed to enjoy the act. Since he did too, he didn't see a problem. Except the obvious-- she was _hanyou _filth and not worth his toenails. For the thousandth time that day, Sesshoumaru cursed that damned human woman for her sin of whelping not one, which was bad enough, but _two _worthless half bloods. _Izayoi, I hope you burn in hell. Damn you! _

At the same time, he fervently blessed her for the one thousand and first time that day for giving birth to the goddess who currently had her pale hands wrapped around behind his rigid thighs. "Mmm," she said, and his eyes crossed.

Kirei was... Kirei. Insane, blue, and impossibly good with her mouth. She was Izayoi's daughter, but not nearly as irritating as her half-brother Inuyasha. Not nearly so...

"Sesshoumaru?" she gasped.

_**And I like the way you still say please**_

"Not yet. Keep going."

She smiled around him and began to purr. He swallowed the urge to howl frantically as she began to vibrate around his shaft. _Bless you, Kuhei you infuriating feline filth, for creating this madwoman. _"Nnnnnngggg."

_  
**While you're looking up at me**_

Her eyebrow rose in mute inquiry, speaking for her otherwise occupied mouth. _Good? _

"Nnnnggg. _Nnnnnngggggg. _Urk."

_  
**You're like my favourite damn disease**  
_

He surrendered and gave in to her. She squealed with feral delight as he fell heavily atop her on the wide bed.

"Who do you belong to?" she cooed while sinking her thin, needle-like claws into his shuddering back.

Silence, broken only by grunts and the moist sounds of skin on skin.

"Come on, say it! Who do you belong to?" Her claws sank a quarter-inch deeper and he gasped. "_Say_ it..."

Torn between pleasure and pain, as was always the way with her, he let go of the tattered remnants of his mind and hoarsely whispered "You."

She smiled widely. "Did you say something?"

He growled, but as always was helpless to refuse her anything. "Yours!" he gasped. "I am yours!"

"Damn straight," she said with satisfaction and twisted just... that... way.

This time, he _did _howl, then slumped atop her struggling for breath. "Good boy," she simpered, stroking his head. "Such a _good _boy."

"I hate you..." he groaned, trembling in the aftermath.

"_Sure_ you do."

_  
**And I love the places that we go**_

"Oy, Sesshoumaru," she called distractedly. He padded into the garden of the Northern Kingdom palace and looked around.

"What?" He simultaneously hated and thoroughly enjoyed visiting her family. Her family hated him, and she hated her family. It was always amusing, if not always comfortable or familial.

"Have we done it here yet?"

He stared at her. Eleven years, two months, and seven days after arranging his marriage to her for political reasons, she still managed to shock him on occasion. "You mean... _here?_"

"Are you dense? Yes, here. In this garden. Have we?"

"...No."

"You want to?"

_  
**And I love the people that you know**_

Every single person in the compound _had_ to have heard them, if not seen them. But no one said a word as they ravished eachother on the sun warmed stone centerpiece of the peaceful garden. The silent presences all around them seemed to spur her on to greater heights, rather than dampen her enthusiasm. Her fervour, in turn, heightened his, until they were both mindless with ecstasy.

"I had no idea you were an exhibitionist, my little puppy," she rasped.

"I am not."

Slyly, she cocked an eyebrow and leaned into his ear. "My uncle is watching through the crack in that door. Looks like he's enjoying himself..."

His eyes bugged and he exploded helplessly into her.

She laughed. "See? Told you so."

_**And I love the way you can't say no**_

The next day she was submissive again. Enjoying the respite, he tied her-- something she rarely allowed. Something about the sight of her helpless and bound drove him wild. On days like this, she never refused him anything he wanted. On days like this, when the wind blew from the sultry south, Kirei was capable of leaving him insensate for weeks afterwards.

_**Too many long lines in a row**_

He'd forgotten the script, but she didn't seem to mind. "I love you!" he howled.

"This is the part where you're supposed to hate me," she reminded him mildly.

"I really could not care less. I love you."

"For some reason, that works almost as well... say it again."

"I love you." And he did. She was insane, vicious, cruel and capricious, glorious and extraordinary in every way. He loved that she could surprise him, he who was so good at predicting people. He loved that he could not defeat her.

_**I love the powder on your nose**_

"Why do you wear that... slop?" he asked one night. "Your skin is perfect, there are no blemishes to cover."

"Because it pleases me." _  
_

_**And now I know who you are**_

"You only ever do things that please you."

"Of course. Is there another way to live?"

"...Not for you."

_**  
It wasn't that hard, just to figure you out**_

Now that he thought about it, she truly_ was _that simple. Given a choice, she would just choose to do whatever she felt like doing at that exact moment, and damn the consequences. It wasn't her decision making system that mystified him, that was clear and easy to see. She did what pleased her, and that was all.

What still eluded him was understanding of just _what _things pleased her in the first place. He was constantly shocked by the new things he discovered that made her happy.

_**And now I know who you are**_

Sesshoumaru reveled in his new, startling understanding of his strange bedfellow for the next few hours. So, she was simply hedonistic and anarchic in nature. That was not nearly so puzzling as what he'd thought before. Now all that he needed was to learn the twisting patterns of what she liked and what she didn't, and it would be smooth sailing from then on in.

_**  
It wasn't that hard, just to figure you out**_

"Sesshoumaru? You have a strange look on your face. Kami-sama drop Enlightenment on your head or something?"

"In a way, Kirei. In a way." She looked fresh and new to his eyes. The lines of her face made sense now, as did her hands on her rounded hips and the boastful arch of her spine.

"Tch. You're a puzzling creature. Thankfully I don't feel the need to understand you, else I might be vexed."

He closed the distance between them and pulled her into his chest. A slow smile spread from his face into her obnoxious hair. She squeaked in surprise when he did nothing further, only rested his hands harmlessly on her back. **__**

I like the freckles on your chest

"How did you get these?" he asked, leisurely tracing the little dark spots that littered her otherwise perfect skin, between her breasts and across her nose. "Neither your father nor Izayoi have freckles."

"I have them because I want to have them." She would not answer any other way.

Little things, things he'd ignored for years. She had scars, all over her. He'd never noticed. They were fine and pale, but there were very many of them and they should not have existed. "And why do you have scars? You are hanyou, you should heal clean."

She sighed and turned away from him, curling in on herself protectively. "The answer to that is in the question; don't ask when you already know the answer."

Mystified, he furrowed his brow. "I do not understand."

"Idiot. I am hanyou. How could I _not _have scars?"

Thunderstruck, he buried his face between her tense shoulderblades. "You mean...?"

"Poisoned wounds do not heal. You of all people should know that."

_**  
And I like the way you like me best**_

"No."

He watched from around a corner, silent and impassive outwardly.

"Kirei..."

"I said _no. _Don't make me angry. You would not enjoy the experience."

The drunken youkai prince staggered and grinned lasciviously at her cold face. "Come on Kirei-chan, we've known each other since... like, forever. Why so shy?"

"It has nothing to do with 'shy', you disgusting idiot. Get out of my way."

Instead of doing the moderately intelligent thing and getting _out of the way_, the overconfident prince leaned in closer to whisper loudly in her ear."That mutt of yours can't possibly give you what you need. I know your tastes, Kirei-chan, and they don't run to ice princes..."

Sesshoumaru's eyes narrowed. He disliked meeting her past lovers, they were invariably obnoxious, gluttonous morons and he hated every one of them for having laid even a finger on his wife. He was suddenly seized by the urge to eviscerate the whelp for daring to solicit her _now_.

He need not have worried.

"Close your mouth before you embarass yourself, Hakate. I told you to get out of my way. It was not a request."

"...And if I don't?"

Sesshoumaru's lips twitched helplessly. He knew what came next. The fool was overweeningly confident because he was full blood and she was not. Underestimating her was a mistake he had only ever made once, and he suspected it would be the same for this poor sod.

"Don't say I didn't warn you," she sighed, and moved. It was her gift, her talent; that impossible speed that made her appear to vanish whenever she used it. In hardly enough time to even _think _about blinking, the youkai man was flat on the ground on his back with the metal-capped heel of her clog bare hairbreadths away from his nose.

"Bitch!" he gasped, and Sesshoumaru winced from his vantage point around the corner as she coolly drove her foot home with a loudly audible _crunch_. The youkai screamed.

"Yare, yare," she murmured as she nonchalantly wiped her bloody sandal on the grass. "That was unwise of you. For future reference, I am well pleased with my mate. Far more pleased than I ever was with you. Disappear."

Around the corner, Sesshoumaru smiled helplessly.

_**  
And I like the way you're not impressed**_

_**While you put me to the test**_

"Too slow!" she cackled triumphantly... from behind him.

_Damn! _he thought, frantically whirling to meet her slashing attack. She may not have physical power to match his, but when she was that fast, she did not need it. If not for her always yelling whenever she attacked, she would have killed him dozens of times over already.

"Is this all you have?" she trumpeted. "You're dead! Again! How is it again the Inuyasha never managed to beat you?"

Gritting his teeth and narrowing his eyes, he threw all of his energy into following her blurred movement. To his utter amazement, he caught her on his third lunge. She melted into his arms and smiled up at him. "Wow, I'm surprised. For that, you get..."

_Save me, for I am lost._

_**I like the white stains on your dress**_

He smirked all the way through the dinner.

She sat beside him cool as snow, seemingly oblivious to all the stares directed at her. More specifically, at her attire.

It had taken her months of cajoling to find a tailor willing to make the kimono for her, and a lot of money once she'd found one willing to do it. The pattern was not remarkable-- it was deep, deep gray, with splashes of white like it had rained bleach. The remarkable thing was the cut. It hugged her upper body and rested off her shoulders, leaving her entire throat and upper body bare to the tops of her breasts. She'd made it specifically to showcase the angry red mark on her throat from Sesshoumaru's teeth.

She was flaunting his mark of possession over her, or so it seemed. In reality, he knew it was actually the other way around. That mark on her neck meant that he'd claimed her, yes... but in reality she saw it as her ownership over _him_. Her triumph. A hanyou whelp, mated to one of the greatest youkai lords in the land. It was something she was secretly very proud of. And now, not so secretly.

Every eye in the quiet pub was glued to her bare shoulders, but for once he didn't mind. The mark would say everything that needed to be said.

_You are mine. _

_****_

And I love the way you pass the check

"Here, you pay," she said shortly when the maid came to collect for their dinner. "I don't want to."

"My pleasure."

She smirked. "Damn rights it is."

_**  
And I love the good times that you wreck**_

Kirei _loved _tormenting him like this. Lost in bloodlust, dripping with blood and agonized with the need to _ripkillrendteardestroy,_ he struggled frantically against her restraining arm.

"That's enough," she purred. "I want you to stop now."

He knew his eyes were red and his fangs were piercing his lip until he tasted his own blood. "No," he said, knowing all the while that it was hopeless. When she said to stop, he always did. Willingly or not. And gods help him, he loved even this. She always made it up to him for ruining his fun. Always.

_**  
And I love your lack of self-respect  
While you're passed out on the deck**_

"How is that you manage to get drunk? Even I have never been able to drink enough alcohol to overcome my defenses," he asked as he scraped her off the planks and slung her over his shoulder.

"Hanyou," she slurred, clothing in slovenly disarray. "S'easy... just drink the strongest stuff you can find as fast as you can until you fall over. Nothin' to it."

"Perhaps a better question is... why do you do it?"

She was quiet for a while, arms draped around his neck. Her breath reeked of sake and burned his nose, but strangely it was not unpleasant to him. Then... "Because it pleases me."

"Of course. What is the _other _reason?"

She smacked him halfheartedly, not really in any kind of control over her limbs. "Pushy, pushy. Bad."

Reaching their room, he laid her down and pulled the cool covers over her. Sitting next to her, he brushed her hair out of her face and touched her cheek. "Why do you stay with me?"

"Because..." she paused to yawn, "it pleases me."

He laughed softly and stood to leave her be.

"And..."

He froze.

"'Cause I love you. Mutt."

His eyelids drifted shut. She was insane and beautiful and he loved her to distraction. Hearing those words made him all too aware of the hold she had on his small, stubborn heart.

"Are you coming to bed, or not?" she asked muzzily, and reached for him. Even sloshed beyond reason, she was still strong enough to topple him into her arms.

"I love you, Kirei. Gods help me."

"I know. And they won't."

**_  
I love my hands around your neck_**

Sesshoumaru was _angry_. "Never," he growled lethally, "do that again."

Her wide eyes like autumn skies stared at him with fright. Kirei had been so confident of her hold over him. It had been a mistake. This time, she'd pushed too far.

"I tolerate your little games because I enjoy them also. But this... _this _I will not tolerate." He gestured to the trembling pair of minor youkai in the corner. One male, one female, both exceptionally attractive. They were naked.

"I'm sorry," she gasped. "I just thought... it might be fun..."

"I will not share you. Nor will I _be _shared. It is demeaning. Get them out of here and leave me be for the rest of the night."

"All right!" He released her throat and let her fall to the floor. She even managed to land in a crumpled heap gracefully. The pair, seeing they were not required, bolted, trailing the stench of fear. Kirei stood and faced him, pale but unbowed. "I'm sorry. I had no idea you would react like that. Will you forgive me?"

His hands twitched, recalling the feel of her slim neck between them. His eyes melted into crimson and he grinned ferally. "Perhaps. Not yet."

She understood. Loving a demon lord was not an easy thing.

_****_

And now I know who you are  
It wasn't that hard, just to figure you out

They had been together for half a century when they gave up on hurting each other and learned to be happy. He thought maybe he understood her, now. She thought perhaps she knew all his tricks.

They were both wrong. Love is a very strange and slippery truth to understand, so they never quite got it.

Thankfully, love did not rely on them to understand it. _It _understood_ them _well enough, and that was all that was ever necessary. It had seen stranger bedfellows than them, but never more interesting ones.

If love could be said to feel, it might have been wickedly proud of its work.

_**  
And now I know who you are  
It wasn't that hard, just to figure you out.  
**_

**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**

**A/N- **If any of you can still speak through the shock of getting this kind of thing from _me_, (of all people), leave a review. Or a flame... this is one instance where I really won't mind. I'll understand. !grins evilly!

Thanks for everything, Kitsune Kit! I love you! I hope you liked it! If not... I already told you to let me know, I don't mind writing another one! **_  
_**

The lyrics were from Nickelback's 'Favorite Damn Disease.' If you don't know it, go listen to it while you reread this. It'll make a lot more sense if you do. Trust me.


End file.
